– UFO in Columbia last night!
*** BREAKING NEWS! ***
In what investigators are calling a strange night, there were lights from a strange unidentified flying object over the river. Multiple witnesses including Ratrick Smith saw the sight for a mere minute or more before it went up in the sky. Smith said the following: “I was smoking my meth pipe last night when I saw a bright light land on the river. Out of it came three little figures that submersed into the river before the craft flew away.” Smith swears that he will never smoke meth down by the river anymore. Please stay tuned with us as we follow and investigate this story!